#TheDiaryOfASocialWorker – 5
In this week’s column, Sreepriya shares some of her personal experiences with mental health that have set her on the path she walks today. These encounters defined her in different ways and encouraged her to explore the field of mental health.
For me, mental health has been an idea deeply rooted in self-realization and development. It is a journey that has a moving destination, and thus is an adventure. On this journey, I have met a lot of people who compelled me to move deeper into mental health as a field. Here are some of their stories:
Lessons In Empathy From ‘L’
She’s a 14-year-old girl who probably has a mild intellectual disability in a school in Delhi. No one knows exactly what her difficulty is. She does not pay attention in class, looks out of the window, fights with the boys, and stays away from most girls. One day, on her borrowed white skirt, there is a large red stain. Everyone mocks her. Some of the girls form a circle around her and shield her from the comments and eyes. She is crying and scared. A teacher gives her another skirt to wear.
Another day, she runs to the terrace and tries to jump off because a boy has broken up with her. The teacher slaps her and sends her to the office as punishment. She stays in school till the 10th standard. No one knows what happened to her after that.
Since I met her when I was quite young, the impression of the crowd laughing at her has been a very strong image in my head. It made me angry, but it also showed me how disconnected we are to each other’s experiences. I began trying to move away from that. “Judge-mental” became a new watchword.
Extending A Helping Hand
She is 26-years-old, wild, with thin wiry hair, a skin infection, and rotting teeth. The social worker finds her near a street food stall in Mumbai. She tries to get her some help, and the girl attempts to bite her because she accustomed to the idea that someone wants to talk to her as she hasn’t been able to speak since she was a child.
She doesn’t know how to sit on the floor because no one taught her how, she barely drinks any water, she’s Mowgli in the city. Her parents are alive and present but are too busy to take care of her. She handles her own food and shelter. In all probability, she has attention and intellectual deficits.
Two years after she joins the daycare, she has made friends, she gets emotional while praying, and she likes the teacher more than anyone else. Oh, and best of all, she has started smiling.
The day I saw her eyes fill with tears while she prayed, I realized that the human mind has so much potential. It can overcome so many traumatic experiences and still find hope and connection without even needing language. Such stories can inspire so many to continue living, fighting and working with people no matter how difficult they are.
The Long Journey To Mental Health
He is from a small town and is good at his studies. He came to the city because he has dreams. He has battled through depression before and has made friends here. Alcohol flows freely here, and there are no restrictions. For two years, he can forget that he has to go back.
We don’t know when he lost control over himself. His old friend depression is back and raging through his system. His studies have become difficult, and coming to class is hard. His body craves newer and newer highs. Life is impossible without it, and one day, his dreams are classified as childish and they are tossed out of the window. The only reality is what his body craves, again and again.
Though he had many friends, no one stuck around for long once he started cutting. Pain makes more sense to him and made him feel real. I am still working with this friend. I’m hopeful, yet disappointed because neither I nor anyone else have been much help. There have been ups and downs, medicine, prayer, therapy, change in environment, and self-help as well. But it is a long journey. He reminds me every day not to feel superior, thinking that I, as a professional, can help anyone permanently.
Moving On: Understanding Real Support
She is shy, intelligent and new to the college. A poet and an artist, she is fun and likes to make people laugh. But no one knows the secret baggage she carries.
Victim of abuse – it’s a label she sometimes feels defines her and gives her an identity filled with things she didn’t deserve to be done to her.
She’s is fearful, worried that she will fail at every new thing she tries. She carries disappointment as well, because no matter how prepared she is, success doesn’t seem like enough.
She approaches me, I am a young student, and I see a sister in her. I have no idea what to tell her, except to stick a large white sheet of paper above her desk which reads ‘It was not my fault’. Over time, she helps herself move on, and is a brilliant student and friend.
She showed me at a young age, what I am meant to do. I might not be equipped with much, but I have the capacity to listen and say, “You are not alone, I want to understand your story. And I hope that you will be able to do what you want”.
Real support isn’t about spoon-feeding a person or giving them what they can’t get by themselves. Real support is when you help a person believe that they are capable of rising above challenges and following their dreams.
Liked reading this? Then you might also like to read about Social Work: The Power Of A Strong Community.
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